segunda-feira, 22 de março de 2010



So many whishes, So many! So much doubt! Pain! Suffering!
I´ve been fighting naked against such a strong army! Why is it so difficult to tear down its fortress walls? I feel like I´m losing my will, my hope! I don´t know if I can still stand this fight!
I know I ´ve been learning a lot! But I´m starting to doubt if it is useful! I don´t know if I want to become one of them! Actually, I don´t! I´m sure! I have come to that conclusion already!

Futhermore, I know that you want me to see them! to learn how they are, to be aware about them! To feel save by knowledge! But I´m in Risk GOD! I need your help! I can´t build and rise my own fortress. I´m naked! I told you! I´m unsaved! I´m SCARED!

Even withh all my efforts I still don´t understand! they are so blinded! GOD! hear me, Save me! Stay with me!

Why do I seem to be so lonely in this Journey? I feel losing energy! I´m starting to fall! It´s like if I was alone! Like if I was the only one that is searching for something bigger, greater, mighty! They are so blinded by their own fears, doubts, uncertitudes, untrusts. Their lack of confidence and emotion are killing the most beautiful thing a human can achieve! It´s not like they think it is! It´s not a joke! It´s not a game! It´s not a number! It´s not just a night of pleasure! It´s not just a moment to slip away! It´s not a test or a try! Dammit! How I´m Still hate this! Where are their Hearts!??? Disgusting!

Show me GOD! Point to me where can I find it! please! I need I way to get inside them! I need a way to enter those walls! To make them believe and see how it´s beautiful! to feel complitaly free!!! Show me GOD a way IN! PLEASE!!!

I´m tirede to fight! I´m tired to stand up for something that they can´t understand! They can´t feel it! They can´t open their heart! I´m starting to doubt if they even have a heart by the way!

It´s not right! I can´t believe! Show me GOD! I beg you! Help me! Open their eyes! Open their Hearts! Let me get in before its too late! I don´t wanna give up, But I´m one more step closer each day! Help me! Please! Listen to Me! Help me destroy their fortress! Now! Love must prevail!

domingo, 21 de março de 2010

Shut up!

Many methods of meditation pass through the process of shutting the voices inside your head. A Silent mind can be really usefull to relax, avoid stress and, also, to be able to focus on specific objectives, sometimes, easier to achive without the thousands of doubts that harm us everyday inside the storm of our brains!

Ok! But there is something that I have noticed that goes beyond the mind. Perhaps, much more complex. Yes, we can turn our brain, our mind and our thoughts off! However, What can we do about this feelings that suddenly appears inside our hearts!? Sometimes, It´s not about Thoughts! Sometimes, we just feel that something is going weirdly! It´s like instincts! How to shut it up!? How can we silence these weird whispers that plague our hearts? It´s not just about our mind! We can control it! But I´m still looking for something that could help me deal with all of this weird voices and breezes inside my heart! Does anyone has a glue? and even like that... remains a question... Will there be smart to work trying to avoid those feelings? I don´t know...
Maybe, it´s better to remains on board! Trying to figure out what is going on... ´cos in the end... perhaps we will at least feel like we were not alone at the whole process... Leading us to good or bad things...
For while... I´ve just remenbered a frase of my favorite song ever... written by dream theater...
"Learning to Live"...
It says: " the way your heart sounds makes all the diference in learning to live"!!!
I think they are right...
Let´s keep vigilant to it! even with all the risk to fall in a self trap!

Cya... ;)